Trump’s 2,000 Lies – A Documentary

Trump’s 2,000 Lies – A Documentary

THE PRESIDENT, BY THE WAY REACHED A MAJOR MILESTONE YESTERDAY. I DON’T FEEL LIKE THIS HAS GOTTEN ENOUGH ATTENTION. ACCORDING TO THE “WASHINGTON POST,” WHICH HAS BEEN KEEPING TRACK I GUESS, YESTERDAY TRUMP TOLD HIS 2,000th LIE SINCE TAKING OFFICE. [ LAUGHTER ] HAPPY LIE2K, EVERYBODY. [ LAUGHTER ] 2,000 LIES IN 11 MONTHS. HE’S […]

Read More

Alexandria Ocasio Cortez: Trump Isn’t Ready For A Girl From The Bronx

Alexandria Ocasio Cortez: Trump Isn’t Ready For A Girl From The Bronx

FOLKS, MY NEXT GUEST SHOCKED THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY WITH HER PRIMARY VICTORY ON TUESDAY NIGHT. SHE’S NOW ON TRACK TO BECOME THE YOUNGEST CONGRESSWOMAN IN HISTORY. PLEASE WELCOME, ALEXANDRIA OCASIO-CORTEZ! ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ( BAND PLAYING )>>Stephen: WELCOME TO THE SHOW. I WANT TO CONFESS THAT I DID NOT KNOW YOUR NAME ON […]

Read More

James Corden Responds to Bill Maher’s Fat Shaming Take

James Corden Responds to Bill Maher’s Fat Shaming Take

>>James: IT CERTAINLY IS. NOW I WANT IT TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING. LAST WEEK I WAS WATCHING THE TELEVISION AND BILL MAHER SAT AT A HOST DESK LIKE THIS ONE. HE LOOKED INTO THE CAMERA LIKE I AM DOING NOW AND HE TALKED ON HIS SHOW ABOUT FAT SHAMING. AND HE ARGUED THAT IT […]

Read More

Jimmy Kimmel Returns with Baby Billy After Heart Surgery

WELL, HI, I’M JIMMY. AND THIS IS BILLY. I WAS OUT LAST WEEK BECAUSE THIS GUY HAD HEART SURGERY. BUT LOOK, HE’S FINE, EVERYBODY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] HE MAY HAVE POOPED, BUT HE’S FINE. I WANT TO THANK CHRIS PRATT AND TRACEE ELLIS ROSS AND NEIL PATRICK HARRIS AND MELISSA McCARTHY FOR FILLING […]

Read More

Mean Tweets – Hip Hop Edition

Mean Tweets – Hip Hop Edition

I don’t think anyone deserves to be kicked in the ballsack in any circumstances. I think that you should take these violent thoughts and place your energy somewhere a little more productive. Well, everybody’s entitled to their own opinion, so I’m not mad at that [BLEEP]. Yep. Yes, I still have my braids. They’re never […]

Read More

Earthquake News Report – SNL

Earthquake News Report – SNL

>>ACTION 9, NEWS AT 5:00. NOR CAL’S NUMBER ONE CHOICE FOR NEWS. >>GOOD AFTERNOON. OUR TOP STORY, A 5.3 MAGNITUDE EARTHQUAKE RATTLED DOWNTOWN SACRAMENTO THIS MORNING, CAUSING WIDESPREAD STRUCTURAL DAMAGE. OUR OWN RANDALL FIELDS IS IN CAPITOL PLAZA. RANDALL, BESIDES THE GROUND, WHAT’S SHAKING OVER THERE?>>WELL LOTS, CAROL. AND GIVEN THE SEVERITY OF THE SITUATION, […]

Read More

Elizabeth Warren: A Country That Elects Donald Trump Is Already In Trouble

Elizabeth Warren: A Country That Elects Donald Trump Is Already In Trouble

TONIGHT, MY FIRST GUEST IS THE SENIOR SENATOR OF THE GREAT STATE OF MASSACHUSETTS AND IS CURRENTLY RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT. PLEASE WELCOME SENATOR ELIZABETH WARREN! ♪ ♪ ♪ ( APPLAUSE ) ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >>YES! ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >>YES!>>Stephen: THANK YOU. THANK YOU, MA’AM.>>WHY DON’T– WHY DON’T WE JUST– ( CHEERS […]

Read More

Trump’s Border Wall, Healthy Food Baby Names – Monologue

-Let’s get to the news. President Trump spoke at a Hanukkah reception today at the White House. Well, technically, he made a wish and blew out the candles. [ Laughter ] [ Laughter continues ] According to The Daily Beast, President Trump dismissed the economic impact of increasing the national debt, saying that he, quote, […]

Read More